Dear Twilight, I'm sorry, what are you really? You aren't literature? You aren't quality entertainment. What Are you? Say it. Say it Out Loud. Are you ashamed? Sincerely, Harry Potter

Let's not forget the SparklyVampireTurningRide. You will be "bitten" by a vampire, where you will groan and scream very inappropriately, and where you will sparkle forever and ever and ever and fall in love with humans hundreds of years younger than you. ENJOY being arrested!